On my way to work is a new construction site. The street has turned in two dead ends almost meeting each other. The cars, even the buses are redirected. A taxi drives up the dead end. I imagine that the taxi has been called because the bus doesn’t service this spot any more. Who has to pay for the taxi? Well probably the passenger, but who should? The passenger? What if he has a monthly ticket for the public transport? Why should he be charged twice? Should the city, who causes the construction site, pay for taxi tickets? Does the bus company have to make sure people can still get to the centre by public transport and should they then be entitled to reclaim the money from the city? Is the person angry for having to pay the taxi, just because someone started digging a whole in the street? Is the person frustrated because he thinks he’s entitled to be transported? Who is liable? I start to fantasize: The bus driver is not a paid employee but just a guy happening to have a big car and going to the city quite regularly. He decides to pick up everyone who stands at the street when he’s going into town to give them a lift. Just like that. The neighbours know this, so when they need to get into town, they stand at the curb and wait for the big-car-guy. They say thank you and tell him what’s up. Now for some reason there is a construction site and the guy doesn’t drive into town for a few days. The neighbours know he can’t get through so they are like: “Oh what the hell, I guess I’ll have to take my bike then.” (That’s just because I like bikes better than taxis of course, in my fantasy no-one calls a cab.) I wonder: Would people be less frustrated? Wouldn’t it be nice not to be so prematurely entangled in all kinds of contracts? Never getting frustrated about liabilities and the feeling that one got screwed over and had to pay twice?

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What is serendipity? Is it plain luck or chance?

Or is it something that reveals itself when we have the right mindset to see it?

“All things are ready if our minds be so.” – William Shakespeare in Henry V

Can one alter one’s mind to experience continuous serendipity?

Isn’t it just logical that you can see the lucky opportunity when you don’t have expectations to make you blind?

Is it serendipity you get when you learn to let the things come to you instead of running after them?

Is it a gift? Is it always there and just waits to be picked up?

At the very least, assuming reality is constructed, everything can be lucky if you let it happen as such.

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What you see in the picture are 71 sunflower seeds.

Sometime last spring, I was still buying things, I got a little package with sunflower seeds for red sunflowers from an organic store. Velvet queen. Queens. I was going to grow red velvet queens. I placed them all in a flower box. Soon the little princesses sprouted. And it got crowded. One was particularly strong and large for her age. I gave her the best bucket I had for the transplant. She grew straight and gracefull. She was my favourite. The second, third and fourth strongest ones I gave away, as birthday or housewarming gifts. She was my pride. She needed lots of water, on my busy days her leaves hung scarily low. She always recovered. Just when her blossom evolved to all its beauty – it turned out to be yellow instead of red – a small dry spell was too much for her to handle. She dried out. Even though I gave her lots of water then, she kept getting drier. Before I moved her to the compost, I looked at her blossom one last time. I was surprised to find it full of seeds. She managed to die just about when all her offsprings where prepared to sprout next year. I took out every single seed, carefully. And failed to grasp what they imply.

Sunflowers live a short live.
It might be a coincidence that the strongest flower was standard yellow and not red as the package suggested.
There is still a chance of getting red sunflower offsprings even if queen mom was yellow.
A sunflower inside a pot on a winter garden can produce 71 seeds.
These 71 sunflower seeds costed several litres of water.
It took several months to obtain 71 sunflower seeds.
I really liked my yellow queen and it’s quite sad she had to go so soon.
A lot of effort for such a short living companion.
I cannot say it was worth it without something inside me wanting to dissent.
I cannot say it was not worth it without something inside me wanting to dissent.
When I eat the seeds, it won’t replace a single meal.
When I add them to a salad I cannot imagine anyone to appreciate the worth of these seeds, as I would wish them to.

When I plant them I get the chance to have 71 sunflowers, which blows my mind.

If my brain would grasp the meaning of scale as I try to make it do, it would probably explode.

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Catch from a quick check at the old store. That fish was awesome! And for those nectarines, I have no clue whatsoever why they were thrown out. Not a single one was spoiled.

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This one’s from October and dedicated to my friend Fe.

Hope you get better soon!

It’s end of October. The last time I went for a regular dive was beginning of August. Together with Fe. With her I don’t feel like a thief peeaking and sneaking around. With her I don’t think of geting caught. With her I don’t feel weird for sticking my head into a dumpster, digging through piles of trash with bare hands. So since she’s gone… whenever I think “Well tonight I should go diving” the stores seeme far away, cold an hostile. I imagine them locked or full with stuff I wouldn’ want anyway, like meat salad or lemonade sweatened with aspartam. I admit, when she was there I sometimes thought: “Damn, I wish I wouldn’t have to share that chocolate”, even though she never took her full share. But now that she’s gone I don’t go at all anymore. So I guess what I’m saying is: I miss you Fe! But by now I have been invited to eat by my boyfriend flatmates so many times, I finally managed to make myself go agin to fill up their stash. I’m especially happy about the merci candy. Alex, the new flatmate and vegan was especially happy about the lettuce and the herbs. This morning he said: “I don’t mind dumpstered food. The herbs are amazing! And the lettuce is still really good. Maybe I should come along next time.”
Well, I’d love that!

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Ok, I got a bit paranoid that someone could track back my garden and kick me out, so I will make it a little bit less informative… I’ll change it back when traffic will be low.

Long time no post.

This is a reopening.

Sooo…. did I give up? Well of course not! But I have been diving vary sporadically the last 6 months. I guess there’s just food everywhere… Which is especially true for December of course.

I also wrote some posts which I didn’t get to publish, but I intend to catch up on them. Even though it is kinda against the topicality of the blog format.

But anyhow, that’s not the main news right now.

The main news is: I’m basically rent-free since mid-November.

This is really crazy to me. What’s striking me as the most crazy is the normality that it has for me now.

So what happened?

As you may remember Ben’s dream is to build a wagon to live in. Last summer we, or mainly he was researching for a place to build the whole thing. We were about to move to a neighbouring village, some kind of commune. I wasn’t really into it, to be honest. Too far out, same rent as before, very small veggie garden for 12 people.

Around that time B. wanted to host a yoga fest in her garden. Ben and I volunteered to help with the preparations (another food source by the way). It was the first time that I saw this lush and wild place, just 10 bike minutes away from my flat. I was in love. Something like this would be perfect for our project! B.: “You have to be very precise what you wish for. It will definitely come true, but if you don’t specify enough, there will be a hook!” I have very ambivalent feelings towards such spirituall-bending-to-esoteric expressions, but if you remember the dumpster god (or divine dumpster deity?) you may understand why I started to wish in very precise terms. A garden, like this one, with water all year round (which this one hasn’t) and electricity, no neighbours that tell on us when we live there and close to the town center, enough space for loads of veggies to live on, and, of course, it must be possible to build a wagon there!
My boyfriend caught the drift and started searching for garden plots on ebay and alike. No magic there, ok.

But if you believe me or not, next day we found a plot almost next to B.’s. There’s only one neighbour in between. Unlike B.’s garden we have water from the city, not the xxx, so it won’t be turned of during winter. There’s power connection. Including B. we have x more or less close neighbors, two of whom who live there permanently too. They won’t tell on us. Besides that there’s only parks. Downhill it takes only x minutes by bike to get to my old flat and the city center. And it’s xxx square meters big!

The hook: It’s right next to a xxxx road, especially now during winter it’s really loud. But I didn’t specify my sound needs…

So of course we took it. There’s a small hut on the lot. I moved all my furniture there, we got a wood stove. It’s freakin cold during winter, 4 degrees when we want to get up in the morning. Running water is just outside the house, not right now though, the plumbing froze. There’s no shower and we sh** into a bucket (actually I think that’s awesome but no guest ever wanted to use it so far). BUT: It’s amazing what sheep skin and duck feathers can do for your sleep. My cat loves to go outside. It’s just awesome to get out of one single door and be in a garden. Cookies taste so much better from a wood oven. The ice flowers on the bathroom window are beautiful. And we are allowed to build the wagons (yes, 2 now) there and there’s lot’s of space for veggies! We even planted seven trees already. And I even enjoy the new internet free zone!

For me it is a big step forward to live more independently and more money free. But: I had to invest to get the place. Is this still freegan?

And now I’ll go offline to go back to the hut to have a nice wood-cooked dinner : )

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Last thing I have to add to that massive dive that’s now about 3 months ago. 3 months? wow.

Ben and I unpacked at his house (see picture in post below) and started playing with the trash – using the shower curtain as capes and the cooking spoon as a sceptre for instance. I was wearing my new Hannah Montana undies, Ben used a piece of mens wears as a hat.

It was then that Brad came in. Obviously we started to talk about underwear. Brad had always worn regular briefs, kinda uncommon for a guy his age…

Anyway, we got him to try on one of our treasures. They were long like boxers yet tight. Brad was delighted. He said it felt like he wasn’t wearing anything at all yet did not feel naked. He just sat there in disbelief. Disbelief that underwear can feel so awesome and in disbelief that he had never gotten around to try much more than classic briefs.

And then he contemplated, distantly:
“I don’t understand. Why would anyone throw away something that can make you feel this free?”

Yes, why would we?
Seriously, what is this world we live in?

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